


Was it worth it ?

by VanillaFive



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Civil War Team Iron Man, Not Team Captain America Friendly, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), but that the general idea, cuz steves a asshole, find out in the next episode, idk why, if you didnt notice the tags, it doesnt say in the fic, just a one shot(?), not sure what this is, oh wait i know, this is something i wrote in a few minutes, who would think eh ?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-14
Packaged: 2018-10-04 09:34:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10273859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VanillaFive/pseuds/VanillaFive
Summary: The question.





	1. The first stop

The sound of walking can mean so much.

How loud, how fast or slow, with enough time a person can determion the person walking and their intention.

 

But some times the same speed with the same sound can mean diferent things.

 

A slow walking person can be a spy carefuly sneaking in to the desired location, a slow walking person can be a tourist admiring animals, culture or someone.

 

A runner can be someone running from danger or just exercing.

 

Sometimes all 4 can be in one.

Like a spy walking throughout a wakandian palace admiring the culture many dont see.

 

Like a soldier walking into the Dora Milaje and handiling them with ease.

 

Like a person asking themselves "i wonder".

 

Like a person breaking into the most secure place on the planet just to ask a question.

 

"Was it worth it ?"

 

Many think the question is full of hate, that the person who asked will kill them all if he answers wrong.

 

Wrong.

 

The question will full of genuine curiosity.

 

Was it worth it, was turning into a national criminal, a terrorist, a killer, killing people accidentally or not, to save one person. 

 

The captain woke up to the that same person in front of him, under him, around him asking that question.

 

Was it worth it?

 

The captain froze, the person could have killed him, could have tortured him, done things to him he doesnt probably even know.

But he doesnt know that.

He thinks if this is Tony back for him, to kill him.

But then he realizes that this is a dream.

That this is himself testing him, to see if hes lying to himself.

But he answers the question regardless.

"Yes"

 

He could not see the persons face but it had a aura of disapointement around it.

 

Yet he falls assleep with a stranger watching him, observing him, yet again wondering.

 

 

The next morning he wakes up again, to start a new day.

To many this is a positive thought, a new day means new things, feallings, actions.

To many a new day is filled with misery, hate, the desire to end the life.

To the captain a new day right after his dream, means going around the palace and finding out that the palace was infiltrated by a spy or soldier that knocked out the Dora milaje  
without a problem and gone to the captains bedroom to ask one question.

"Was it worth it ?"


	2. The second stop.

The alcohol burned in his throat, was he in pain ?

 

The better question is when he isnt.

 

Everything hurts.

 

He cant even look at the armor anymore, the only way he can work on it is through holos.

 

Even then hes stretching it.

 

He blocked out the arc reactor.

 

The suit is better than ever.

 

Even then

 

he cant stop thinking about it, about them.

 

He fucked up again.

 

Whats new, eh ?

 

Everything and anything he gets in contact with him crumbles.

 

From his body, relationships, lives to the Avengers.

 

Vision or Rhodey will get him from the workshop again.

 

Drag or carry him actually.

 

Whats new, eh ?

 

He can see the headlines when the public finds out.

 

"Tony Stark destroys the avengers"

 

The alcohol burns his throat

 

Hes wondering with the amount of alcohol, drugs and injuries he had or has,

 

how he still alive ?

 

Was he supposed to die with his parents, at the cave with Yinsen, from Obie, from the poisoning, from cap ?

 

Is this his personal Hel ?

 

Thor said there is a Hel, who knows maybe this is a illusion.

 

Made just for him (he feels so special) to torture him.

 

But if this is still real life.

 

Why is he still alive ?

 

For people like the Spiderkid, which he probably ruined the look on superheroes for him ?

 

Another thing he destroyed.

 

He meet a few times with him, hoping to distract him from...

 

well...

 

life. 

 

He feels good when hes with him in the workshop with him listening him, teaching with, just being in his presence and not destroying something about him. (Weird)

 

Who knows maybe the kid is feels pitty for him.

 

Is it bad that he doesnt care ?

 

That means he will know when to back out when hes about to...

 

he doesnt know... just do something shitty to him.

 

The alcohol burns him throat

 

He feels someone around him, probably Vision.

 

He feels like hes floating in the air, relaxed.

 

He feels sorry that they have to carry him, and have to deal with him on a almost daily basis.

 

The hands around him feel light, like they are made of light.

 

He feels them infront of him, under him, around him.

 

He doesnt care.

 

Hes probably hallucinating the hands thing.

 

He hopes hes not a big problem (WHO IS THE KIDD-)

 

He hopes that the braces will eventually be perfect.

 

Who is he kidding he is Tony Stark he can d-

 

*sigh*

 

He cant lie to himself like that anymore.

 

The hands feel good.

 

Like his mothers caring for him, carrying him to his bed because he fell asleep on the mini work shop Howard made for him.

 

So he can be usefull.

 

His bed feels light.

 

His body feel heavy with the weight of his sins. 

 

Even when he tries to get rid of them he fucks up.

 

What new, eh ?

 

The hands feels nice, and light.

 

He falls asleep with a person (probably Vision) watching, observing him.

 

 

He wakes up from a nightmare, not the cave, not Obie or Bucky pulling his heart out, not cap destroying his heart, but his mother watching him calmly.

 

Like she isnt being choked by a metal hand.

 

Sometimes its the Winter soldier, sometimes its the armor.

 

 

He fucked up at Siberia

 

What new, eh ?

 

He knows that.

 

He tells FRIDAY to drug him.

 

Only way he can sleep these days.

 

In the morning, he wakes up to FRIDAY panicking.

 

A person came in to the workshop disabling security around them with no problem.

 

Just to watch him fall asleep in the workshop doing something.

 

Just to carry him to his bed.

 

They didnt do anything else.

 

Is it bad he doesnt care ?


End file.
